Letting Go to Begin Living Again
One of the best pieces of advice I have received lately was to let go of thinking about the future. It was then a dear friend told me that I would begin to find peace, and she was right.
I was worrying about too many things at once, and to worry about the future in a world where every week is constantly changing from lockdowns to tier changes, it is difficult to grasp what a stable future can be like. I have begun to take each day as it is, one by one and it has lifted some of the weight off my shoulders.
I have begun to put trust back into the universe. The world has broken and fixed itself again at multiple times in history and we are currently living in one of the broken times. But, she will put herself back together and humankind will make it through this period. We just have to trust.
And to put trust in the world is incredibly hard, but once you start to let go and have faith in the universe things become lighter. By accepting that I have no control over the way the world is going and only can control how I get myself through it, has brought me some peace.
I have begun to practice positive affirmations. These are words or phrases that I will write in my journal every night, and what I will tell myself if I feel things becoming overwhelming, and it does bring me peace. It helps stave off panic attacks and it has helped me sleep better.
These affirmations include:
- I have trust in the universe and divine timing
- I attract love and success, and love and success will find its way to my loved ones
- What is meant for me will find its way to me
- I release what no longer serves me
- I will not worry about what I cannot control
- I will attract a love that is worthy and deserving of me
- I am becoming more confident every day
- I am grateful for all that I have
- I will be kind to myself and others today
- Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative
It’s small steps like these that help rewire the way my brain thinks sometimes. By replacing the negativity and intrusive thoughts with positive affirmations I have managed to boost my mood, and calm down my anxiety enough that I can cope without medication and sleep better. Now, there are days where I fall off and things do get too much that I can’t do these things, but for the most part, I am getting through the day to day on much better terms with myself.
The pandemic has taken control, routine, and stability out of the lives of many, and that has been difficult to grasp over the last year. As someone who lives with anxiety, a consistent and stable routine is key for me not to spiral. It's been a challenge to find one with work changing constantly and the freedom of movement and activity shifting from extremes. But, by having the small day to day routines of unwinding, journalling, and skincare before sleep I have managed to regain and have a sense of stability in the everchanging world.
I have hope that by this time next year I won’t have to be writing things like this. About the world being broken and finding ways to just exist, but instead about rediscovering what life is like to live again.
